Years ago, Troy and I were at a Crosby, Stills and Nash concert. During intermission we were talking to an older couple who told us about making wine.
They moved into a school bus in 1970 and still live in it today. They don’t buy wine and still make their own. Troy asked about the process and by the end of intermission, had the basics for trying his hand at making wine. Hippie style.
Ok. Let’s give it a shot.
We had two options. One made from a Kool aide packet and one from frozen grape juice. So, we tried both.
I wanted frozen grape juice and Troy wanted to try the Kool aid. His favorite flavor is Berry Blue.
The ingredients for both are the same with the exception being the Kool aid or frozen juice. Distilled water, grape juice or Kool aid, sugar, and yeast.
The first thing on the list was to put a little dish soap and water in a big pot. Bring it to a boil. Then pour it out.
Well, first off do you know what happens when you boil Dawn?
The bubbles grow and grow, turning into an odd mushroom shaped tower.
Then they split apart (explode) and make a huge soapy mess.
Once we cleaned up the soap mess, we rinsed the pot and put the distilled water on to boil.
For the grape wine we added sugar to the boiling water. Let it dissolve, then cooled it in an ice bath.
For the Kool-Aid wine we poured the sugar directly into the container then added the distilled water once it cooled.
While the water was cooling we poured 2 containers of grape juice concentrate into the water jug.
Then activated the yeast for the Kool-Aid wine.
We poured the sugar water into the container with the grape juice.
And then emptied a yeast packet directly on top of the juice/sugar water mixture.
Our instructions were not to mix the yeast; just let it sink.
We poured the warm water onto the sugar in the Kool-Aid wine container.
Shook well and then added the activated yeast.
Again, no mixing, just yeast sinking to the bottom.
The instructions for the Kool-Aid wine say not to add the Kool-Aid until the wine has fermented, which will take 6 to 10 days.
The man who gave us the instructions made it clear that when we added the Kool aid “There will be a reaction.” He says he does it in the bathtub.
I have decided that process will take place outside.
There was one last step for each jug and that was to cap them.
We poked a pinhole in two balloons, covered the mouth of the jugs with the balloons and then secured them with rubber bands.
This will let the CO2 that builds up out without letting air in – or so the man said.
The directions for the grape wine said to put the jug in a warm place away from sunlight and in a spot where it can sit for 6 to 10 days without being moved.
The directions for the Kool-Aid wine said to “find a safe, warm place to hide the jug”
Hide the jug? But only the Kool aid jug?
What?
It’s not like we’re making moonshine in the mountains here so I don’t feel the need to hide the Kool aid jug.
Both jugs went on the top shelf of the kitchen pantry where they will sit, wait and ferment.
I woke up the next morning and can see that something is happening.
The next morning the balloons were starting to inflate.
Sadly, I cannot tell you if this worked or not.
A few days later I woke up to find that the grape juice balloon had exploded. Sugar water and grape canned grape juice EVERYWHERE! The jug was three quarters empty. It was on the ceiling, the walls, and the floor. AND covering every box, jar and can in the pantry.
In hindsight, I really wish I had taken pictures. I used every bad word I knew. Then made up some new ones. Following that, I sat down on the floor and cried.
Not over the wine but the fact that I now had to wash EVERYTHING in the pantry.
Troy walked in, said “Damn that sucks” and then left for a photo shoot.
It was a long day.
And the Kool aid wine? Its balloon was barely growing but I put it in a trash bag and straight to the outside trash can. The “reaction” that’s supposed to happen when you add the Kool aid is NOT happening at my house.
So, here’s my tip to y’all. If you’re going to make wine, use a kit. Taking verbal directions from two old, stoned hippies who have been living in the same school bus for decade isn’t a good idea.
